The Thanksgiving Pageant of Doom - Free Kindle Fiction

The Thanksgiving Pageant of Doom: A Funny Dog Book for Kids (The World According to Perdita Whacknoodle)
by Jim Gibson 

A VERY Different Kind of Dog

Does your family talk about your interesting relatives? Tell tales about crazy uncles or swap stories about odd aunts?

Of course. All families have lots of funny stories.

But most people don’t know that dogs have stories about THEIR families, too.

And most people don’t realize that their dogs might have opinions and ideas about everything!

Laura would never have believed that dogs even HAVE thoughts. Would you?

But Laura was quietly doing homework one day when she heard a strange little voice.

At first she was a scared, since most fourth-graders don’t hear voices, but soon she figured out that her dog, Perdita, was transmitting “thought particles” directly into her brain.

And those dog thoughts were NOT like anything Laura would have ever imagined.

Can you imagine YOUR dog transmitting thoughts directly into YOUR brain?

The World, According to a Very Strange Dog

Soon Laura realized she was having an adventure no one else had ever had. She was getting thoughts, ideas, opinions, and most of all, stories, from her DOG!

So, now she writes all Perdita's stories down, and that’s what this book is.

These are Perdita Whacknoodle’s stories about her very odd, very large dog family—stories about her uncles, aunts, cousins, grandpas, grandmas, and her mother.

But you’ll see that lots of Perdita’s most exciting stories are about her father, an adventurous—and possibly crazy—dog she calls “Par.”

Par is rarely home at the farm. Instead, he’s out having big adventures, creating chaos and excitement in cities and towns across the country.

Par steals garbage trucks, drives Farmer’s tractor, tries again and again to perform on the school’s stage, and becomes the enemy of the pompous school principal, Mr. Wimpy when Par invades the school's Thanksgiving Pageant.

You'll never guess WHY Par goes up onto that stage, but once he's there, the battles begin, and don't end until Par makes this a night the town will NEVER forget!.

Perdita claims that Par always wins these battles. He makes Mr. Wimpy (and the police) look foolish time after time.

Really? Could a dog outwit the police and all the people who are chasing him?

“Yes,” says Perdita. “It’s easy, because dogs are so much smarter than humans.”

No kidding. Perdita Whacknoodle really believes dogs are smarter than people.

Who IS Perdita Whacknoodle?

In The Thanksgiving Pageant of Doom, A Funny Dog Book for Kids you’ll learn a lot about Perdita’s family and her strange way of looking at the world.

You’ll read about the time Par tries to help the cows be happy--but instead he creates widespread cow panic. This infuriates Farmer, and you’ll never guess what happens next.

You’ll meet Perdita’s great-great grandpa, Einstein Noodle, a ”very scientific dog” who wants to discover where the moon goes every night. You’ll find out what happens to him when he tries to say “Goodnight, Moon.”

You’ll read about Uncle Rip van Noodle who finds a perfect field of dreams to practice his “meditation.” Laura thinks his “meditation” is really sleep and that Uncle Rip is an idiot, but Perdita believes he’s one of the most brilliant members of her dog family.

You’ll find out how Perdita “cures” Laura of a disease she doesn’t have and how she teaches Laura to take “an intelligent walk.”

Amazingly, Perdita Whacknoodle thinks—really!—that SHE is the most perfect dog ever.

But Laura thinks that Perdita is probably crazy. And arrogant. And delusional

Does Your Dog Think Like Perdita Whacknoodle?

Could YOUR dog be thinking like Perdita? Is your dog hyper-active like Par, or lazy and “more thoughtful” like Mar?

Could YOUR dog have dozens of stories about his crazy family?

One thing is sure: when you read Perdita’s books you’ll never, ever look at dogs the same way again.

Could Perdita Whacknoodle be right? Are dogs REALLY smarter

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